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A May Journal Entry

It’s so hard to let go of that need to control I want to truly feel and let go Sometimes It’s like fear of time is what makes you want to control everything That fear of not having enough time makes me want to fear the future And In return I try to control what’s around me into order for everything to come out the way I want now and be at my destination now I remain a hermit at times because including myself in my surroundings makes me that much more anxious to be somewhere else. Seeing it online makes me that much more anxious But why? Do I want to prove to everyone “who I am”? Do I feel vengefulness because people over look me? 1: that self image has to go 2: feeling this way is that need for control, and having doubt And now that I’m aware to it I can change it I’m trying to teach myself to go with the universes flow Surrendering to life and all it’s lessons it has yet to show.

#journalentry #May

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